Friday, 5 February 2010

Why Worry?

Why do we worry? We stress and fret we go over and over something in our mind we loose sleep over IT (whatever IT may be, a relationship, a job, a bad hair day) and when something is resolved we shift our attention to something else to worry about or even worse, mull over the worst case scenario of the situation which has now been resolved.

There are cases where it seems natural to worry, for example, when your teenage son is out all night and you wait for him to come home in the early hours, or when a loved one is sick, or if you don't have enough money to survive, etc

But what does worry really do?

Create more worry!

Worrying makes you ill in the long run, it overstimulates adrenaline production, putting your body into constant alert creating unrealistic reactions to all problems however small or large. This creates PANIC and panic attacks!

So, what to do when gripped in a worry cycle?

1. Press the pause button.

2. BREATH!!!

3. Make a conscious effort to CHOOSE not to think the worst.

4. Take back some control in a situation where you feel you have no control by being active in the situation.

For example, with the son out all night, pre-arrange with him to call you or for you to call at a certain time, or whatever else you decide together.

With the sick loved one, find out about the illness, be involved in their therapy, keep the channels of communication open, may be even sharing with them your concern and listening to their concerns.

With the bad hair day?!! What I do is put a hat on and get on with it (sorry for the lack of compassion here!!!)

If things are not working out for you, for example, there are constant arguments in your relationship; business deals keep falling through; you don't get the job you apply for,

You need to PAUSE and really take time to reflect what really matters to you.

Connect to how you feel, what is it you NEED to feel HAPPY?

Caroline Myss says,you need to separate what you WANT with what you NEED. Myss suggests that following what you WANT operates on a pain-pleasure scale easily tipped and broken, whereas following what you NEED is a deeper soul path, bringing challenges where you can discover your greatest talents and inner resources.

So, for example, you really WANTED that business deal? But it didn't work out. Your inner self is saying, 'I know you really WANT that but I know you NEED to do something else.

This approach may not help in making decisions easier, or stop you from worrying, But the inner clarity and wisdom that it brings will make your life much more fulfilling, and hopefully with less worry!!!!

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